I wanna be a Teen Titan!
by kazumigirl
Summary: Sequel to "Merry Christmas" kind of-you should read that fic first to understand this one . One a rainy day, the kids have no idea what to do, so they decide to be Teen Titans. Has one swear word, so rated k


**I wanna be a Teen Titan!**

_Author's Note: It would be a really good idea to read my other fic, "Merry Christmas" first. Oh, and I realize some of the grammar is wrong on the kids' parts, but I did it on purpose_

"I'm so bored!" Nine-year old Dexter whined as rain poured outside. "It's been raining for days!"

"Why don't you play one of your new video games?" His mother suggested, hovering over to a pot simmering on the stove. She removed the lid and sniffed it curiously. "Ooh, Dex! Daddy's making beef stew tonight!"

"Can I go over to Bruce's house?" Dexter asked, ignoring the beef stew comment. Of course, it wasn't really Bruce's _house_ since they all technically lived in the same house, but Bruce's family's wing of the tower.

"I don't see why not," Bee replied, tasting some of the stew. "Do you wanna take Cricket along?" Cricket was Dexter's nine-month old sister.

The boy made a face, eyeing the baby on the kitchen floor, chewing on a wooden spoon. "Do I have to?" He asked, wrinkling his nose. Not that he didn't love his sister, but she wasn't much fun to play with.

"Of course not, Baby," his mother said. "I'll call Starfire and let her know you're on way."

-----

"Hey!" Six-year old Bruce eagerly flung the door to his family's wing of the tower open seconds after Dexter knocked. He had been as bored as the other boy. "Come in!" Both children went into the living room and Dexter frowned slightly when he saw nearly three-year old Merit, and the two-year old twins, Lucky and Dash.

"My parents are babysitting," Bruce explained sheepishly. "But we don't have to play with them." When Dexter didn't look convinced, Bruce added, "My mom said so."

"So what do you want to do?" Dexter asked as he followed Bruce to his room. "I'm tired of playing video games and watching TV."

They both sat down on the floor and pondered this for a moment. They couldn't go outside because of the rain, and they weren't allowed in the gym. Bruce's mind wandered off to consider how unfair that rule was, as well as being forbidden from the evidence room, and he suddenly formed an idea. "Let's be the Titans!"

"Like our parents?" Dexter's brows furrowed. Bruce nodded his head rapidly and stood up. "We can play it right here in the house!"

"Are you going to be your dad?" The other boy inquired, beginning to like the idea.

"Mmm…not today," Bruce shook his head. "I'm gonna be…Beastboy!" He clicked his teeth together and growled. "I can turn into any animal I want!"

"Okay!" Dexter grinned. "Then I'm going to be Robin!" He puffed out his chest and belted, "TITANS, GO!"

They began to 'fly' around the room, and then Bruce really took off in flight, buzzing around the small space using his inherited Tameranian powers. Dexter stopped and scowled. "Hey! Beastboy can't fly!"

"If he's a bird, he can," Bruce pointed out diplomatically.

"But you're not a bird," Dexter accused. "You're not even squawking."

Bruce rolled his eyes and said, "Squawk, squawk. There. I'm squawking." He continued to fly. "C'mon, Robin! The High Five's up to no good again!"

"Hey!" Dexter barked. "I'm the leader! I'm supposed to say stuff like that!" He cleared his throat and picked up a pixilated drawing toy. "Titans! The computer indicates there's trouble! It's the High Five up to no good again!" He pretended to look around. "Beastboy, where is everyone?"

Bruce hovered in the air, staring blankly. Dexter drummed his finger against the board and growled, "Well?"

"Where are they?" The other boy asked, being Bruce Grayson again.

Dexter sighed and returned to being himself for a moment. "Let's say they're getting pizza or something."

"Why aren't we there?" Bruce actually sounded hurt. "Why are we at home?"

"Okay, they've been kidnapped by Slade!" Dexter sighed, exasperated.

"Why aren't we out saving them then?" Bruce furrowed his brows. "That's dumb that we're fighting the High Five when Slade has our friends."

"They're just not here, okay?!" Dexter threw the board down. "We don't have enough people so-"

Suddenly, there was a soft knock at the door. Bruce flew over and opened it just a crack. It was Merit. She smiled up at him shyly and asked, "What are you guys doing?"

"Stuff," Dexter told her. He did not want the two-year old to know they were on a great adventure. She'd want to join in. They had no place for her in the game.

"Oh." Merit fingered the side of her pants and asked, "Can I play?"

"We're not playing," Bruce said, frowning. "We're the Titans and our friends have been kidnapped by Slade."

"Oh." Merit's eyebrows raised, amused. "Can I play?"

"No," Dexter walked over and shoved her out the door. "Go play with the twins." He shut the door and turned to Bruce. "Now, Beastboy, where were we?"

----

Starfire hummed as she browsed through her native cookbooks, combining odd ingredients in a bowl. Her humming was interrupted when she heard a pouting whimper. She looked around, and then down to see little Merit sticking her bottom lip out. The Tameranian knelt down and brushed some dark violet hair out of the toddler's face. "Bumgorf?" She asked. "What troubles you?"

"Bruce and Dexter are playing Titans and they won't let me be one," the little girl replied. She sniffled a bit.

Starfire wasn't like some mothers who would make the older children entertain the little ones just to keep them out of her hair. She understood that they were boys, and that they were older. Thinking quickly, she suggested, "Perhaps you and I play a game."

Merit looked at her curiously. "Can we be Titans?"

"Certainly!" Starfire nodded her head. She put a finger to her chin. "Which Titans shall we be?"

Merit grinned. "You can be Waven!" She giggled. "My mommy!"

At that moment, the twins wandered in, and Merit smiled at them. "And Dash can Cyborg! And Lucky can be Starfire!"

The sister and brother pair didn't know what was going on, but they smiled. Starfire giggled and remarked, "That sounds glorious!" She frowned slightly. "But, who shall you be?"

Merit pondered this. "I'm Slade," she said, growling. "The monster!" She raised up her arms and said, "And I've got you all captured at my house!"

"Oh no!" Starfire gasped. "I mean-" she took a deep breath and rolled her eyes. "Oh no."

"And you, Starfire!" Merit pointed at Lucky. "I took your juice cup!" She reached over and took the two-year old's juice cup. Lucky began to cry.

"And you, Cyborg!" Merit sat the other two year old on the floor and removed one of his shoes. "I took your shoe!" She smiled at Starfire and whispered, "I took his shoe, Aunt Star."

"You shall not get away with entrapping us!" Starfire growled. "The Titans can overcome any trial!"

Merit stared at her blankly. "What?"

"It means you will not get away," Starfire whispered.

"Oh." Merit smiled, and then laughed menacingly. "I get away with everything because I don't have a mommy and daddy to tell me no!" She playfully hit Starfire. "Now be quiet, Raven! I'm going to do something bad! You wait here!" She then whispered, "Pretend you're tied up."

Lucky started to wander away and Merit frowned. "No, Starfire. You're tied up, remember?"

"No." Lucky pushed the older girl's arm away.

"Yes!" Merit squealed stomping her feet. "You're tied up!"

"NO!" Lucky screamed and stomped her own feet.

"Now, Slade, Starfire," The real Star warned. "Please remain calm." She took each child by the shoulder, but Merit was angry, and so was Lucky.

"She won't stay!" Merit began to cry, still pushing the other toddler.

"NOOO!" Lucky continued to fight Merit off, and settled on biting her. The older girl began to wail then and exclaimed, "Starfire bited me!"

----

The two boys who had been playing in the bedroom stopped abruptly when they heard Merit scream. Dexter cocked an eyebrow at Bruce. "Your mom bit Merit?"

"I dunno," Bruce opened his bedroom door. "Let's go see." He and the other boy wandered into the living room where Starfire was comforting a crying Merit and pouting Lucky.

"What happened, Mommy?" Bruce asked his mother. "Did you bite Merit?"

"No," Merit sniffled, pointing to Lucky. "Starfire did."

"That's not Starfire," Dexter informed her. "That's Lucky."

"Not today," The real Starfire sighed. "For now, we are engaged in role playing that infers that Lucky is Starfire, I am Raven, Dash is Cyborg, and Merit is Slade."

The boys eyed Merit. "You can't be Slade," Bruce told her. "You're too little."

"Well you can't be Beastboy," Merit retorted. "Because you're not green and you don't have pointy ears!" She wriggled her own pointed ears.

"Wait a minute," Dexter said, thinking aloud. "In _our_ game, Starfire, Raven, and Cyborg were captured by Slade." He eyed Bruce. "Maybe we could put them in our game."

"But Merit is being Slade!" Bruce pouted. "She's not a good Slade!"

"I'm not a good Slade!" Merit yelled. "I'm a bad Slade!" She stomped her feet. "And I'm going to kidnap Wobin and make him my princess!"

"What?!" Bruce exclaimed. "That's not what the real Slade did!"

"Yah huh," Merit told him. "My mommy and daddy said Slade put nannyprobes in all the Titans so Robin would be his princess!"

Starfire, the real one, busted out laughing. She clutched her sides and wiped at her eyes. The children looked at her curiously. When she calmed down a bit, she kissed Merit and giggled, "You are too much."

"That isn't what happened!" Bruce growled. He looked worried. "Is it, Mommy?"

"_Apprentice_," Starfire corrected the toddler. "Slade forced Robin to be his apprentice."

"That's what I said," Merit shrugged. "Now which one of you guys is Wobin?"

"I'm Robin!" Dexter growled. "And I'll never be your apprentice, Slade!"

"But I taked Starfire!" Merit grabbed Dash and quickly informed him. "You're Starfire now."

"Tay," the other toddler nodded. He had picked up a coaster and was now focused entirely on that.

At that moment, the door opened and Robin stepped in. "I'm home," he said, briskly taking off in the direction of the mission room.

"It's Bumblebee!" Merit grinned.

"He can't be Bumblebee!" Dexter said. "Bumblebee's a lady!"

"What's going on?" Robin asked, turning around and stopping. Starfire grinned and suggested, "Might you take a seat on the sofa and find out?"

Robin sat down on the arm of the couch and watched. Merit, eager that she now had an audience, deepened her voice and growled, "Now, Robin! Will you be my apprentice since I have Starfire?"

Robin snorted and shook his head slightly. Dexter gritted his teeth and ordered, "Giver her back, Slade! Or I'll use my kung fu on you!"

"Wait a second." The real Robin glanced at his son. "You're not Robin?"

"No, Daddy." Bruce rolled his eyes. "I'm Beastboy." He then got down on his hands and knees and growled. "I turned into a tiger! Raah! Raah!" He darted forward towards Merit and nudged her with his head. "Raah!"

"Ahh!" Merit squealed, giggling. "The tiger's eating me!" She turned to Starfire. "Waven, you're now under hypnosized by me. Get Wobin!"

Starfire winked at her husband and pretended to clutch her skull. "You shall never control me! Nothing may enter my mind!"

"And Starfire!" Merit turned to Dash. "I still have your juice cup!" She held it up and toddler only shook his head, still fascinated with the coaster.

"Where's Cyborg?" Dexter asked, pretending to throw kicks and punches. "We need his laser cannons!"

"She bited me remember?" Merit reminded them darkly. She looked at Robin. "You wanna be Cyborg?"

"Sure." Robin slid off the couch and bellowed, "Boo yah!" He turned to Dexter. "Do you have the sonic?"

"If you got the boom," Dexter grinned, understanding his uncle's joke.

"Time out!" Merit waved her arms. "Slade has to go potty!" She toddled off to the bathroom, and when she returned, she held up her hands to Starfire. "Smell my hands, Waven! They smell like blueberry soap!"

Starfire smelled them. "Why, Slade, your hands do smell nice." She kissed the little girls hands. Merit giggled.

"Okay, what happened while I was gone?" She asked in a deep, raspy voice. "Did Robin become my princess?"  
"What?" The real Robin cocked a brow.

"She means _apprentice_, Daddy," Bruce explained. "I mean, Cyborg."

"Aren't you guys forgetting a super important villain?" Everyone turned around to see Beastboy and Raven standing in the doorway. Merit smiled and ran to her parents. "Mommy! Daddy!"

"I think you mean, TRIGON!" Beastboy picked up his daughter upside down and swung her around. "I'm a big, ugly red guy!"

Merit squealed with laughter and ordered, "Put Slade down!"

"We've been here for about five minutes," Raven explained to the others. "This is pretty interesting."

"Who are you gonna be, Aunt Rae?" Bruce grinned.

"Um, an innocent bystander?" The half-demon woman suggested, shrugging slightly. "A patch of grass?"

"You can be Bumblebee, Mommy!" Merit suggested. "And you can be sad that I took Cyborg's shoe."

"Whatever." Raven sat down with the others.

"Okay, Slade." Beastboy set his daughter down. "You work for me. You be my bitch now."

"BEASTBOY!" The adults growled, their eyes wide.

"Oops." Beastboy's cheeks turned red. "I mean, _worker_."

Merit stood there for a moment silently, and then asked her father, "I thought Mommy said you was her bitch?"

"MERIT!" Beastboy _and_ Raven turned red this time.

"Anyway," Robin said, trying not to laugh. "Moving on, Slade has everyone kidnapped but Cyborg and Robin."  
"And Bumblebee." Dexter pointed out.

"And don't forget Jinx." Kid Flash appeared in well, a flash. His twins toddled over to him and he picked them up, kissing them each. "I'm Jinx, by the way."

His wife approached him and scoffed. "Well I'm not Kid Flash."

"Who are you then? What other sexy Titan is there?" Her husband asked, bouncing his babies in his arms.

"Aqualad." Jinx smirked. She turned to Merit and waved her hand. "You can keep all of them, just give me Jinx."

"No." Merit smiled. "They're all mine."

A knock sounded at the door and Robin and Starfire both called, "It's open!"

Cyborg and Bumblebee stepped in, Cyborg carrying baby Cricket. Bee waved at all of them and told Dexter, "Dinner's ready, Honey."

"Aw, but Mom!" He groaned. "We were just about to defeat Slade!"

"Oh?" Cyborg grinned. "Who's Cyborg?" He winked at his son.

"No, I'm Robin," Dexter told him. He pointed to one of the babies in Kid Flash's arms. "That's Cyborg."

"Oh." His father's face fell.

"I'm Bumblebee," Raven said flatly, raising her hand.

"Nice," Bee nodded with a chuckle. "So who's Slade?"

"Me!" Merit exclaimed. "I taked over the world and made Robin my princess and I'm Trigon's bitch!"

"MERIT!" Everyone warned.

"I mean worker," the little girl corrected herself.

"Well," Bumblebee glanced at the clock on the wall. "Why don't we finish the game tomorrow?"

"Who will you be?" Dexter asked.

"Cricket," his mother shrugged. "Who else?" She leaned over and kissed her daughter. "And Daddy will be Dexter."

"Can I be Slade next time?" Bruce asked. Robin rolled his eyes. Starfire chuckled and said, "I would wish to play the role of the Trigon."

"Who will you be, Mama?" Beastboy kissed his daughter.

"I'm gonna be Merit," Merit grinned.

The End…


End file.
